reallifegoeslikethis
reallifegoeslikethis
i
The physical journey that i traverse
is a journey of the soul
transport of the self from a motherland
to a district collected by sight and mind
the knowledge that sweats from it
is a stranger's knowledge,
from one who has learnt to see, think
and choose between
the changing realities
ii
it's true i have growled at my father and mother
but only after having told of my predicament
that they have never brought to reason
the family that i began to love in my loneliness
in a nation that alienated me,
they took to their predecisons.
i have not entirely returned, i know,
having been changed by time and place,
coarsened by problems
estranged by absence
iii
but look
i have brought myself home,
seasoned by confidence,
broadened by land and languages,
i am no longer afraid of the winds
or the differences between people,
not easilly fooled
by words or ideas
the journey was as loyal teacher
who was never tardy
in explaining cultures or variousness.
look, i am just like you,
still Muslim,
still Malay,
sensitive to what
i believe is good,
and more ready to understand
than my brothers.
the contents of these boats are yours too
because i have returned.
iv
travels made me
a seeker who does not take
what is given without sincerity
or that which demands payments from beliefs.
the years at road and foreign states
have taught me to choose,
to accept only those tested by comparison,
or that which matches the words of my ancestors
which returns me to my village
and its perfection
v
I've learnt
the ways of the rude
to hold reality in a new logic,
debate with hard and loud facts.
but i too am humble, respecting
man and life
vi
i am not a new man,
not very different
from you;
the people and cities
of the foreign ports
taught me not to brood
over a foreign world,
suffer difficulties
or fear possibilities
i am you,
freed from the village
its soils and ways
independent, because
i have found myself
-with minor changes from original version by Muhammad Hj Salleh-
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